Weird metaphor, I know.
So now that we’ve got that out of the way, let’s talk about how—weird or not—that’s exactly how life feels sometimes.
You decide one day, “gee, that wheel looks nice.”
It’s so shiny, and you see all the other hamsters chugging along with a smile of contentment on their faces (for the sake of this post, let’s assume that hamsters do indeed smile).
You want to make that wheel spin, too.
After a moment or two of trepidation, you just hop on.
Once you get your footing, you realize, “this is fun!”
You get into a rhythm, you savor the way your feet (claws?) repeatedly pound the surface, and you relish the breeze blowing your hair (fur?).
But then. But then you’re moving so fast and your legs feel heavy and you know it will hurt if you suddenly jump off, but you know the pace you’re going isn’t sustainable and you’re not sure how to slow down.
All you know is your energy is depleted and you feel like the wheel is running you instead of the other way around.
Yes, that’s kind of how life feels sometimes.
I’m so fortunate to be where I am in life.
Above all, I’m healthy and safe. I’m loved and well-fed. I’m employed and able to spend irreplaceable time with my family—my supportive, handsome, and loving husband and my smiling, mischievous, and snuggly little boy. I sometimes get to travel and try new, exciting things, and I have a dog who loves me unconditionally.
I feel like I have no right to feel anything but joy and gratitude, and when those aren’t my default emotions, I then feel guilty.
I feel like my life is so damn privileged that it should always be rainbows and sunshine.
But sometimes, no matter your awareness of your privilege, you just feel stuck.
So, then, what do you do?
First you acknowledge that you need the wheel. The wheel gives you activity and purpose and it keeps you healthy and fulfilled.
Then you learn that you can, in fact, control the wheel. You may stumble or you may have to rely on an outside force to help slow it down, but you can get back to a steady walk or maintainable jog.
Even better, you can share your wheel. You can rest and eat and practice self-care while somebody else runs for a while.
You can watch and learn new techniques. You can sit back and realize why you love the wheel. That the wheel is yours and it moves as quickly or as slowly as you allow it.
And then when you’re ready, you can hop back on, knowing that you are in control.
I’m linking up this post to Julia’s new series, Mental Health Monday. While she’s planning it to be ongoing, I figured participating this first week was especially important since May is National Mental Health Awareness Month. Be sure to visit her site for more posts.
- Do you relate to this metaphor?
- What do you do when you begin to feel overwhelmed?
- Do you or somebody close to you struggle with mental health issues?
When I feel like this, I try a new project or take a day trip somewhere to get out of the rut. A change in atmosphere or in focus for a bit of time is usually what I need to get out of the wheel.
Thank you so much for participating in MHM! I also really agree with Ellie. When I feel stuck in a rut of sorts, I do everything in my power to fight that by changing up the routine. Even if it’s as simple as eating a new meal or starting a new book, finding the difference in a day can make all the difference.
Thanks for the linkup – I’ve enjoyed reading the other posts.
You’re so right – just changing up the routine is sometimes all it takes to shake the rut.
I agree that taking a break or just changing the atmosphere is the best way to handle stress. Sometimes a change of pace is all we need.
This is such a perfect metaphor and very beautifully told. You capture that state of co-dependence so well, especially that we can take a break. Love this post.
Thank you, Kathleen. Thank goodness for breaks!
I really loved this! I feel the same exact way about “being privileged” and feeling like I can’t complain. From an outsiders perspective, it would seem rude but everyone’s feelings matter, no matter how privileged they are.
When I’m overwhelmed sometimes I try to keep working but that just isn’t working in anyone’s favor. When I realize that I need a step back, I usually turn everything off that’s stressing me out and give it a break, even if it’s just for a night and then resume again in the morning.
Thanks, Melissa. It’s crappy how we “judge” ourselves because if somebody else were in my shoes, I wouldn’t think their issues were insignificant, so why treat ourselves that way? Something to work on, I guess.
This is a great post and I feel like I can relate to this metaphor. I am diagnosed with depression and generalized anxiety. Mental health awareness month is such a great way to raise discussion on a topic that so many are shy to talk about. Thank you for this post! <3 xoxo
Thanks, Lyss. My husband is pretty convinced I have GAD and I’m not arguing. I think for the first time I’m going to actually see somebody/look into meds. Thanks you for reading and sharing! I always appreciate your honesty and willingness to “tell it like it is.”
I can totally relate to this metaphor. In fact, I tend to pile even more into my life when I am feeling overwhelmed but often I find that taking a week or two off from one of my ‘more optional’ commitments provides that precious extra time to refocus and provide breathing room or allow me to get a more achieved to a higher standard in other areas of my life. Oddly though, I find that it’s when I have less structured responsibilities that I become most overwhelmed. I definitely needed to hear the concluding lines of this post!
“Oddly though, I find that it’s when I have less structured responsibilities that I become most overwhelmed.” <– me, too!
Glad you've figured out a way to handle the overwhelmed feelings and know when to take a break!
My brain is like a hamster wheel! I have to remind myself a lot to relax and breathe. That wheel is one tiring place to be, thank you for sharing this!
Thanks, Sarah! Hope you’re able to relax and breathe a little more.
Yes! I do feel like this often. I really felt like it at the end of grad school- I like I wanted so badly to be making progress but feeling stuck where I was at. I’m doing my best to enjoy where I am at in the moment and not think so much of where I want to be.
I can only imagine how grad school felt like a perpetual “wheel.” It’s good you get a little bit of a break now.