Hey there – I promise I haven’t jumped ship and that I’m still around. Go figure, after posting my thoughts on how our culture is obsessed with the notion of “busy,” I have no explanation except that—wait for it—I’ve been really freaking busy.
Busy at work and busy visiting family (a much-welcomed “busy”). Last weekend we drove to see my in-laws as well as Mark’s grandmother and uncle (whom I’ve only met twice before) who were visiting. We did a lot of relaxing on the deck, chatting, laughing at Bazooka, and dining out (and in) for some delicious food. It was so much fun seeing them interact with Bazooka for the first time, and I truly hope we don’t let years go by again before we do it all again.
So, while I enjoyed that time away from the computer, here I am popping in on my favorite blogging day of the week to let you guys know that, yes, I’m still alive.
And once again, I’m not going with any pre-written content because I CAN’T FIND MY FLASH DRIVE!!!
My flash drive that had tons of posts written to be used at a later date. Posts that I am rather fond of. And some text I was going to add to my in-progress new blog that I really want to get running in the next couple of weeks.
So, instead of continuing my freaking out, I’m going to cross my fingers and pray that it fell out of my bag and is situated cozily in my desk drawer at work. Or that Mark can find it.
So, there you have the frustrations part of this post.
That, and, I’m tired. And still trying to find balance but rather liking being busier.
Being busy at work, and being able to contribute much more than I was previously, is such a welcome change of pace.
I feel like I have a purpose again, as melodramatic as that sounds.
Do you ever really think about your purpose?
I mean, on the surface (and perhaps most importantly), my purpose is mother to Bazooka.
Along the same lines, my purpose to my husband is wife. And support. And friend. (And better half, obviously.) 😉
And, while those are incredibly important and noble purposes, sometimes I really question my true purpose as an individual and what the heck I’m doing and why.
For instance, my purpose at work. I’ve mentioned before that I don’t work in the field of my college majors, but that doesn’t mean that my education was a waste or that I’m less valuable as an employee.
Also, there are many, many times (a month, at least) when I question my purpose with this blog. Some days it’s incredibly fulfilling (especially lately), but other days it’s overwhelming and I find myself wanting little to do with it.
Right now, though, I find blogging therapeutic and necessary to my sanity. While I may not know my true purpose in a world inundated with personal blogs, I know that the act of writing, creating, and sharing gives me purpose in what can sometimes be a monotonous life. That’s why I need to reevaluate how I use my time to write posts, plan content, and interact with other bloggers. And that’s why I have no intention of giving this up and can’t wait to debut the new design!
Anyway, I apologize for the rambles; thanks for letting me think out loud today. I promise I will get my act together soon, especially if I find that darn flash drive!
So tell me…
- Do you struggle to understand your own purpose?
- When is the last time you lost something important? And did you ever get it back?
Gosh, i think you’re over-thinking things. Live your life; enjoy it; do what you want to do and what makes you
Happy. This isn’t high school anymore, you don’t have to get the best grades and impress your teachers. You’ve made it. Let yourself be!
Ha, I am the queen of overthinking. But you’re right. 🙂
I used to obsess all the time about my purpose and finding some important niche that would make my life worth it. This led me to much unhappiness and never feeling like I was enough, just as I am. I had to let that go and realize my purpose is being Ellie and that I am ever evolving and changing. I love to blog and share my story not because I’m wise or have great advice, but maybe my experience with help someone, make someone feel like their not alone or just give them a laugh. That’s enough for me 🙂
“not because I’m wise or have great advice, but maybe my experience with help someone, make someone feel like their not alone or just give them a laugh. That’s enough for me:-)” YES.
I think I often feel like oh, I am not an expert or doctor or trainer or whatever so my opinion/thoughts don’t matter, but that’s not what it’s about. And in the big picture of life it’s not about that either. It’s about sharing and experiencing. I’m glad you’ve figured that out fairly early on. 🙂
I think our identity and purpose go hand in hand. For so long I put my identity in being the skinniest girl on the block and the one who was obsessed with food. I discovered that is NOT my purpose, and I think my purpose is just being a child of God. I have so many new hobbies, and I think our identity can lie in those too and whatever makes us happy and thrive. 🙂
That’s an awesome attitude. I think college is such a fantastic opportunity to discover who you are and move past any parts of your past you aren’t necessarily proud of or want to define you.
I believe this is to share the love of Jesus to others. When I see this as my purpose, I realize that I can fulfill it in anything that I do. I sometimes get confused and frustrated as well, so don’t feel like you are alone. I am glad that your job is serving as a fulfilling part of your life!
Yes – that is such a big purpose and something we should all strive to do. That’s actually some really great advice; it doesn’t matter so much the WHAT as the HOW and with WHAT ATTITUDE. 🙂
Oh Catherine, I am in this place right now SO much. I am so sorry about your lost posts. I hope you find the drive! I usually just write my drafts in WordPress, but if my blog ever crashed/was hacked, I’d have none of them. So I should probably do something about that…
I am struggling hardcore with my purpose right now. I just launched my photography and design business and really want that to be my purpose but it’s been way more stressful and time consuming than I thought and not in good timing with our big move. I love it no doubt and know it’s my passion, I just haven’t harnessed how to control the work flow yet and feel so lost in it! Every time we move, which is a lot, I struggle to find my footing again because my friends, activities, and routine always changes. Right now I want my purpose to be focused a lot more on motherhood though. We only get these baby yeas for so long before they’re gone. I am definitely spending way too much time trying to make my “purpose” something other than motherhood because being a SAHM is just not “purposeful” feeling (but it should be, my priorities are just out of whack).
I also keep my blog as a part of my purpose and to have a non-mom/just-for-me outlet. Rebranding my blog really helped me realize what I want to blog about and made feel better about keeping it around. I hope you feel the same in the coming weeks with your blog launch too!
I can’t imagine how difficult it is for you right now – I’d consider feeding yourself and child and not having mental breakdown a success, haha.
It seems (from the outside, obviously) that you’re doing a good job, though. It was so hard for me on maternity leave, so I applaud how you’re able to take care of yourself (working out, blogging, your business, etc) and be a great mother to Claire. Oh, and you know, be a wife, too.
Everything will come together – maybe not right away, but it won’t always be so stressful!
Melissa, I’m really grateful for you as a mom, and I just want you to know that, because MOMS are so essential. Moms are GIFTS. Moms are amazing! All you moms out there, this daughter is 100000% thanking God for you. <3
First of all, I am sending you a huge virtual hug as I feel like you need it! I hope you find that flash drive soon as I know how frustrating it is!
I think you need to take a moment to think about all the incredible things you’ve achieved. It’s easy to feel like you’re not “measuring up” but it’s really all a matter of perspective!
I found it! Or I should say the husband found it.
Thanks for the virtual hug and encouragement. I think I’m just in a funk. Luckily it’s not constantly weighing me down. <3
Purpose is so difficult, and for a long time, I really struggled with wanting to find it in other people and their approval of me and my body. The more the Lord enabled me to find purpose in Him, the more content I became, and it’s still a battle. But I’m so thankful that we were all created with a purpose, that each one of has a role, a gift to use in this world. I really super enjoy your rambling posts, cause they’re just real. The way you talk, reminds me of myself. I so agree with Kate that sharing the love of Jesus is one of the most awesome things to do. I’m not often as good at it as I’d like to be, but His grace empowers me everyday. :'( And lost posts sound so sad, BUT, maybe you’ll get more and more inspiration after the fact. I’ve found often that failure has been my friend to spur me to a more energy filled blog post. Boy, the last time I lost something semi-important was about a month and a half ago. I didn’t get it back, but I’m thankful that it enabled me to see what I was still had even after I lost that.