February 26 – March 4 marks this year’s National Eating Disorder Awareness Week (NEDA Week) and 2018’s theme is “Let’s Get Real.” I am not a medical professional, nor have I ever been diagnosed with an eating disorder, but this topic is important to me, so I wanted to contribute to the conversation. Please take care of yourself if you think you may be triggered by this post.

If you tried to convince me that you didn’t personally know at least one person who’s suffered from an eating disorder or unhealthy exercise addiction, I wouldn’t believe you.Disordered eating habits, self-talk, and behaviors have become incredibly common among women and men, which is tragic, considering that eating disorders have the highest mortality rate of any psychiatric disorder (source).

In fact, estimates show that 20 million women and 10 million men will suffer from some type of eating disorder in their lives (source). Our society, unfortunately, contributes to this staggering statistic.

What, you don’t believe me?

Then take a scroll through Instagram and peruse some #fitspo.

Read the news about Weight Watchers offering free memberships to teens (a demographic that’s arguably the most vulnerable to body image and food-related issues).

Or just pay attention to the women and men around you—in your fitness classes, among your office cubicles, and at your dinner tables.

Diet talk and self-deprecating body discussions are everywhere.

Having been a gymnast and deeply self-conscious teenager, I’ve had my own share of body image and food struggles.

Let’s get real—I still have those bad days where my inner critic is louder than usual or the food guilt creeps in when I splurge or skimp on the vegetables.

It’s unfortunate, because food and body image shouldn’t take up so much space in our lives!

While I’m generally at a place where I can eat fairly intuitively and appreciate my body for the many wondrous things it’s accomplished in my 34 years on earth, I still let perfectionism and a deep desire for control infiltrate my thoughts.

In fact, as I recently move toward gaining better control of my reactions to stressors and practicing compassionate behaviors instead of destructive ones, I’ve noticed my mind turning to food and exercise more frequently.

Like realizing at bedtime that I was 400 steps from my daily step goal—and having to march around the house, in the dark, half-naked (sorry for that visual), to reach an arbitrary number

Listening to my husband “rebuke” me (in an “are you serious?” manner, not a critical one) for deciding against adding ketchup to my tater tot waffle because “nah, that’s too much sugar” (don’t worry, I went back for the ketchup)

Buying to-go cake balls at a group outing—and wondering, self-consciously, how many people were judging me for being so indulgent (the cake balls were for Mark, Luca, and me—but so what if they were just for me?)

Weighing myself every morning “just to see” if the scale crept down a pound or two—because, even though I don’t actively want or need to lose weight, there’s still something exhilarating and gratifying when you see a lower-than-expected number

Cringing at my “muffin top” while catching a glimpse of my relaxed leggings-clad body in the mirror

Reprimanding my inner, competitive “mean girl” when somebody in my group fitness class chooses higher weights or lunges across the floor more quickly than me (and having to remind myself it’s not a race)

Feeling accomplished that one day I forgot to eat breakfast or those other times I made it through the morning with a non-grumbling tummy after eating one brown rice cake topped with peanut butter, instead of the usual two…

Honestly, I could go on…and that makes me sad.

In the last few years, I’ve come a long way regarding my body image struggles. Very rarely do I pick my reflection apart in group fitness classes like I used to.

I eat when I’m hungry, and I skip snacks when I’m not.

I experienced a healthy pregnancy and gave birth to the most beautiful and kind-hearted little boy in the world—and every day spent chasing him around the house or backyard is a blessing.

Having negative thoughts is one thing—we all have them—but acting on those thoughts and becoming consumed by the notion that we aren’t good enough or worthy of being loved is where things get serious.

So let’s all get real. Real with ourselves, real with our loved ones, and real with our expectations from the media and wellness/beauty industries.

#NEDAweek 2018: Let’s Get Real & #breakthestigma Share on X

When these critical thoughts come up, let’s get real and talk about them.

When we recognize an unhealthy habit in one of our friends or family members, let’s get real and approach our loved ones with concern and kindness—but never judgment.

When we are angered by the news, reality TV, and misguided inspirational quotes or images, let’s get real and change the conversation.

[linking up with Amanda for thinking out loud]