Any time that I’ve gone through a rough patch regarding my mental health, body image, or eating habits, my biggest roadblock for changing my direction or asking for the help I needed was simply this: “I am not struggling, unhappy, sick, (insert applicable adjectives) enough.”

We are taught from a young age to take care of ourselves. To be independent. To avoid taking others’ generosity and care for granted or becoming a burden for our loved ones.

Being self-reliant is, of course, something to which we should all strive, but there comes a point where we must realize that our journeys cannot continue without the guidance, steady hand, or advice of another.

NEDA WEEK 2019: COME AS YOU ARE

The theme for this year’s National Eating Disorder Awareness Week (February 25 through March 3) is simple: Come as You Are.

That’s right. Come as you are in this moment. 

Not…

“when you are sick enough”

“when your weight plummets to ___”

“when your relationships fall apart”

“when the diagnosis is official”

 “when your family gives an ultimatum”

“when you’ve gained ___ pounds”

“when you’ve achieved ___ recovery milestone”

…or any other metric that isn’t always measurable or black and white.

To grow in your journey, to enter into healing or continue a path of recovery, you simply must come as you are, accepting that where you are today isn’t necessarily where you will be tomorrow.

Whether you turn to food as a coping mechanism or fight obsessive thoughts about nutrition and weight, your struggles—and your steps toward health and acceptance—are valid.

One thing I cherish about the wellness community I’ve “met” through blogging and from the many supportive online groups I belong to is the lack of judgment and the willingness to validate each other, no matter what obstacles we are facing.

Our personal struggles do not alienate us from one another; moreover, they are simply a virtue of being “a feeling human in a messy world” (to borrow a phrase from a favorite author/figure, Glennon Doyle)—an indicator of our common humanity and shared experience of wanting to be loved, appreciated, admired, viewed as beautiful, etc.

By being vulnerable and accepting that we will often make mistakes or stumble in our journeys, we can embrace one another and create a healing community, rather than an isolating, victimizing, or villainizing one.

if you’re sick or struggling, but are unsure exactly how to “come as you are,” try taking these steps:

take this self-screening test if it seems like you have a problem but you’re not sure where to begin

confide in a single, trusted friend who has your best interest at heart

step away from social media and images and activities that you find triggering

try to identify your feelings the moment they arise—and question the reason you feel a certain way

join a supportive community—at church, on your college campus, or virtually—where you will be held accountable

take the body acceptance challenge and reject the diet culture

find a therapist (there are so many well-qualified therapists among our communities—it’s all about finding the right fit)

join local movements in whatever capacity you can

and remember: being vulnerable does not make you weak; it shows your STRENGTH.

#ComeAsYouAre and join the movement against diet culture #NEDAwareness #NEDAweek Share on X